[kj] OT

[LONESTYLE at aol.com]

Holy shit Jamie!
 
Those are pretty funny! :)
 
 
~ LB 
 
 
In a message dated 1/2/2008 1:55:54 P.M. Pacific Standard Time,  
fatpotanga at gmail.com writes:

I've  probably mentioned this before (but when has that every stopped me?)  
A guy (called Jamie funnily enough) in my old dive club, on his honeymoon  
came out of the bathroom naked & thought it'd be a good idea to  impress his new 
bride by farting.
He bent over, let rip & this 'widget' as he called it flew out of his  arse 
and landed square in the middle of the newspaper she was reading!
Strangely enough the marriage didn't last long.
--
My mate Geoff on a 1st date got caught short & nipped in a park for a  poo.
It was very cold & dark, he was drunk & fell backwards onto it  and had it 
smeared all up the back of his coat.
--
Another friend of mine tells a tale from his student days of his house  mate 
(again after beer) going for a huge, satisfying dump.
He leaped back into bead only to have shit squirt up his back & onto  the 
wall.
In his enthusiasm he'd neglected to pull down his underwear.
--
another guy I know worked on a road gang.
A newbie turned up one day working on a pipeline down a country  lane.
He needed to go & asked his workmates what they did.
Just go in the hedge they said.
off he goes, and has a great big dump.
What he doesn't know is one of them was on the other side of the hedge  with 
a shovel who catches it all & spirits it away leaving this poor sod  somewhat 
flummoxed when he stand up see nothing after what was probably a  satisfying 
motion.
--
Another friend Niall cites this as his 2nd most embarrassing  moment.
There'd been a house party & he'd been drinking pretty solidly for 2  days.
So much so he lost control of his bowels & shat himself.
being drunk he took all his clothes off, managing to cover  himself & the 
floor & walls in poo.
being drunk, he then went out onto the landing stark naked, covered in  shit 
with a miniscule dick after 2 days of constant booze & declared in  front of a 
packed house his undying love for this girl & threatened the  guy she was 
getting off with.
I'd love to know his 1st most. He won't tell.
--
my mate Richard went off adventuring all over South America. he does some  
serious mountaineering.
He climbed up a huge mountain despite rock falls & an avalanche  warning.
Reaches the summit & after hours of holding it in just has to go to  the 
toilet.
He inches to the edge, digs his crampons in and squats down - arse over a  
thousand foot drop or whatever it was.
He hears this almighty roar & in his own words literally shat himself  as he 
looked round expecting to see an avalanche.
Beneath him was a passenger jet!
--


I have a lot more poo stories but thankfully that's all for now  children.





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