[kj] ot - dear red states

[Brendan]

Poor old Olly would end up Munsoned down in Texas...


> I would sign that on paper as if it were the Declaration Of Independence

> all over again..

>

>  

> ... ... ... ... ... ...

>

> [looking at the current state of things..]

>  

> 'Save me...

>   save me from Tomorrow..

>     I don't want to sail in this Ship Of Fools...'  

>

>

>

>

>

> ________________________________

> From: fluw <fluwdot at earthlink.net>

> To: A list about all things Killing Joke (the band!)

> <gathering at misera.net>

> Sent: Wednesday, November 5, 2008 9:05:50 AM

> Subject: [kj] ot - dear red states

>

>

> From a random poster on the net:

>  

>  

>  

> --------------------------------

>  

>  

>  

> Dear Red States:

> If you manage to steal this election too we've decided we're leaving.  We

> intend to form our own country, and we're taking the other Blue States

> with us. In case you aren't aware, that includes California , Hawaii ,

> Oregon , Washington , Minnesota , Wisconsin , Michigan , Illinois  and all

> the Northeast. We believe this split will be beneficial to the nation, and

> especially to the people of the new country of New California.

> To sum up briefly:

>

> You get Texas , Oklahoma and all the slave states.

>

> We get stem cell research and the best beaches.

>

> We get the Statue of Liberty.

>

> You get Dollywood.

>

> We get Intel and Microsoft.

>

> You get WorldCom.

>

>

> We get  Harvard.

>

> You get Ole' Miss.

>

>

> We get 85% of America 's venture capital and entrepreneurs.

>

> You get Alabama .

>

>

> We get two-thirds of the tax revenue, you get to make the red states 

> pay their fair share.

>

>

> Since our aggregate divorce rate is 22% lower than the Christian

> Coalition's, we get a bunch of happy families.

>

> You get a bunch of single moms.

>

>

> Please be aware that Nuevo California will be pro-choice and

> anti-war,  and we're going to want all our citizens back from Iraq at

> once. If you need people to fight, ask your evangelicals. They have kids

> they're apparently willing to send to their deaths for no purpose, and

> they don't care if you don't show pictures of their children's

> caskets coming home. We do wish you success in Iraq , and hope that the

> WMDs turn up, but we're not willing to spend our resources in Bush's

> Quagmire.

>

>

> With the Blue States in hand, we will have firm control of 80% of the

> country's fresh water, more than 90% of the pineapple and lettuce, 92% of

> the nation's fresh fruit, 95% of America's quality wines, 90% of all

> cheese, 90% of the high tech industry, 95% of the corn and soybeans

> (thanks Iowa!), most of the U.S. low-sulfur coal, all living redwoods,

> sequoias and condors, all the Ivy and Seven Sister schools plus Stanford,

> Cal Tech and MIT.

>

>

> With the Red States, on the other hand, you will have to cope with 88% of

> all obese Americans (and their projected health care costs), 92% of all

> U.S. mosquitoes, nearly 100% of the tornadoes, 90% of the hurricanes, 99%

> of all Southern Baptists, virtually 100% of all televangelists, Rush

> Limbaugh, Bob Jones University, Clemson and the University of Georgia.

>

>

>  

>  

>

>

> We get Hollywood and  Yosemite , thank you.

>

>

> Additionally, 38% of those in the Red states believe Jonah was actually

> swallowed by a whale, 62% believe life is sacred unless we're discussing

> the war, the death penalty or gun laws, 44% say that evolution is only a

> theory, 53% believe that Saddam was involved in 9/11 and 61% of you crazy

> bastards believe you are people with higher morals then we lefties.

>

>

> Finally, we're taking the good pot, too. You can have that dirt weed they

> grow in Mexico

>

>

> Peace out,

>

> Blue States

>

>

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