[kj] OT: wierdness/Muddy Waters

[gathering@misera.net]

Great poo stories today guys,haha...

some of the disabled people we work with smear it on a daily basis,but it's no fun to have to clean it up,haha.Cheers,CliffMonk-A


----- Original Message -----
From: Phil <tofield@cica.freeserve.co.uk>
Date: Friday, March 19, 2004 10:13 am
Subject: Re: [kj] OT: wierdness/Muddy Waters

> I used to work on a forestry thinning gang. We had a 16yr old lad
> working with us, fresh out of school. When you're working in the
> forest, miles from the nearest toilet, you occasionally have to 
> find a
> quiet spot away rest of the gang, dig a hole and take a dump in it.
> When this happened, we used to return to the gang carrying a polly
> bag, with a lump of soil, or a stick inside it, and tell Ray (the 16yr
> old) that the bag contained your dump, and that you were taking it
> home to flush down the toilet. Ray found this whole idea totally
> disgusting, and claimed he could never crap into a bag, he would
> always hold it in until he could find a toilet. We kept this up for
> months, until one day Ray anounced that he needed a dump and couldnt
> wait any longer, and he wandered off into the woods, carrier bag in
> hand. We all stood around waiting to see what would happen, then about
> 15 minutes later, he returned carrying what looked like a weeks
> shopping! We promptly fell about laughing......for several hours! He
> later told us that the most difficult part was positioning himself
> over the bag, so he ended up taking his trousers and underpants
> completely off in order to get his legs through the handles!
> Within a week, even Ray's mum was calling him 'Baggy'!
> 
> On Fri, 19 Mar 2004 08:47:40 -0800 (PST), you wrote:
> 
> >
> >We were just talking turds here.
> >
> >I had been out for a curry and beers one night and , well, let's 
> just say that I was fully functioning! We have some sample bags 
> here, so I thought to myself that i would put a sample in the bag. 
> Jeez what a state! Condensation off that bastard was something else.
> >
> >Anyway, this managed to upset everyone so much that I had an 
> idea. The next day I got a Mars bar and chewed it up and spat it 
> into a bag (a clean one I would add). I then offered said "turd" 
> to my colleagues for their pleasure , needless to say they 
> believed it to be real, and declined. " Well, does anyone mind if 
> i do?" You should have seen their faces when I reached into the 
> bag, pulled out the "turd" and then preceeded to eat said exhibit. 
> The horror was a wonder with one girl actually wretching her guts.
> >
> >Works a treat at kid's birthday parties too!
> >
> >
> >
> >--- Devacor@aol.com wrote:
> >In a message dated 3/19/2004 7:46:34 AM Eastern Standard Time, 
> >tofield@cica.freeserve.co.uk writes:
> >t'was me, Tim.
> >My mate Joe told me this story. He swore blind it happened to 
> him. I
> >dont see him very often nowadays, and he always was one to 
> embelish a
> >story, shall we say! Anyway, it didnt matter to me at the time 
> whether>it was true or not, 'cos the way he told the story had me 
> in stitches,
> >one of those times when you wake up laughing the next morning!
> >phil
> >got a good one for you along the same line- my friend used to be 
> a painter. 
> >One of the golden rules is you dont use the bathrooms in the 
> house. 
> >My friend was having some problems that day and really had to 
> take a dump, so 
> >he went against the rule and went into the house bathtroom to 
> take it. Once 
> >he did and went to flush he realized the toilet was broken as 
> their wasnt 
> >anything in it to make the water flush- so he had to wrap TP 
> around his hand like a 
> >baseball glove and "fish it out and give it a toss out the 
> window"- the prob 
> >was though that in the water in the toilet there was evidence 
> left that 
> >something was in there, but nothing could be done about- from 
> there his co-workers 
> >named him- "Muddy Waters"
> >true story
> >
> >
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